As a husband, your position is one of service, never dominance. If you really understand Ephesians 5, you will see that you are to lay down your life for your wife in the same way that Jesus laid down His life for you. He gave Himself up for you. In God's eyes, loving your wife as Christ loved the church is the only reason you are to leave your father and mother and be married.
With that in mind, what does your wife need? I don't mean what does she want, but what does she need to help her become everything she is supposed to be in Christ? What kind of fertile soil are you providing for her to prosper spiritually?
Your marriage relationship is to be an example of the relationship Christ has with the church. The world is supposed to see Jesus through how they perceive your interaction with your wife. How is that working for you? How do your actions toward your wife - caring for her spiritual life, placing her before yourself, communication to others about her - reflect the character of Jesus in front of others?
In general, men, the family is out of order in this world, mostly because men don't comprehend the impact of their actions toward their wives. You as a man need to understand the spiritual implications of your husband to wife interactions. You need to know that interaction not only affects your whole family, it affects how those who are watching you see Jesus. Your continual awareness of your wife's needs is one of God's ways of you fulfilling your offices of husband and father in His eyes. He considers it good stuff! Do you?
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